Project X

AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaarrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhh!!!!

Ahem, OK so a couple of high-schoolers decide to throw the ultimate make or break party while one of the guy's parents is away. Its all shot in mockumentary style and is pretty much based on this guy...



...an Australian teenager who threw a massive house party which resulted in huge amount of damage and mayhem.

So first of all, this movie is incredibly awful. The least, you'd think, with a story like that you could probably thrown something fun if completely stupid together ala Old School. Or even something serviceable despite its leery, obnoxious characters ala The Hangover...

WRONG!

Project X is like looking through the window at a house party you will never be allowed into. There are several montages of people drinking, dancing, taking off their clothes, jumping around, having a fuck-load better time than you're having!

The characters are all absolute pricks, the women are basically there to take their tops off and be pretty much abused by anyone with a cock.

The arrogance of this monstrosity could only be put on paper by a teenager and that teenager is a dick. Look at the ending, particularly that of the relationship between our hero and his love interest, how that is resolved is mind-boggling. No adult could have finished the last line of that and thought 'yes, people will buy that, I'm a comic genius'. The film is like a 15yr old boy's dream, where nothing has real consequence, girls are dumb and easily manipulated and everything is funny even when it really, really isn't. In fact I would've been won over if the film had ended up being just a wet dream of some obnoxious adolescent and he had to just clean himself up and go to school, where none of this had actually happened. At least then that would fucking explain how this movie actually fucking happened!?!

There is a lot more I could shite on about Project X and its appalling nature but the one big problem for X, one which one could've saved all of this hate and bile I'm spewing, is that there are no jokes. Nothing. Not a single funny thing happens. Sure there are things I assumed the writers intended on being funny i.e angry midget, swearing, calling people 'faggot' constantly, women taking off their tops and guys talking about how they are going to 'fuck that' then indeed fucking that. I just couldn't find the jokes, for the most part the party just happens until its not happening.

A complete waste of my fucking time and my time is NOT important!